“Keith, I’m in stage four cancer. Please pray for me.” The message came from a stranger who had welcomed me into his prayer circle. An hour later, I was crying on the side of the road.
A guitar chord stopped me during my bike ride on the Jones Beach boardwalk. It led me into a circle of strangers who invited me into their prayer group. What happened next became a powerful lesson around empathy in leadership, human connection, and why we cannot lead or build trusted relationships with people we have never taken the time to know.
The Music That Stopped Me
It was 6:00 a.m. when the sun woke me through the shades. I remembered the promise I had made to myself the night before: Get up, get ready, and get biking.
Thirty minutes later, I began my usual ride toward the Jones Beach Boardwalk. When I reached it, I had a choice. Going right would take me on a 35-mile ride. Going left, only 15.
For some reason, I went right.
As I passed the outdoor restaurants, I saw about 12 people gathered under a canopy. I smiled, waved, and continued riding until I heard someone playing guitar.
The music made me slow down. Something pulled me back, so I turned around and rode toward the group.
They were singing biblical songs about God, hope, love, and connection. Their faith was different from mine, but something in their voices made me stop and listen.
I took off my hat out of respect. As the song became a blessing, one of the men looked at me with the guitar resting in his lap.
“Would you like to join us?”
“I don’t want to impose. Are you sure?”
“Everyone is invited. Come. Take a seat.”
I got off my bike and sat among them. We sang, prayed, talked, and began getting to know one another.
Then I uttered the three words that make my children cringe whenever we travel together.
“I play guitar.”
They know what typically happens next.
“Would you like to play?”
“Sure.”
Music Became Our Common Language
He handed me the guitar, and I searched through the hundreds of songs stored in my head. Most of what I play comes from The Beatles, grunge, jam bands, and classic rock, but I wanted to choose songs that honored what we were experiencing together.
Then I stopped thinking and followed my heart.
- “Ripple” by the Grateful Dead
- “My Sweet Lord” by George Harrison
- “One” by U2
- “One Love” by Bob Marley
- “Let It Be” by The Beatles
- “Shine a Light” by The Rolling Stones
These were not biblical songs, and it did not matter. They did not ask anyone to believe the same thing.
Whatever our faith or whom we pray to, each song carried a universal message of hope, love, compassion, acceptance, caring for one another, and our connection to something greater than ourselves. Music allowed strangers of different faiths to sing together and, for that moment, become one.
We prayed. We talked. We laughed. We listened with care and presence.
An hour later, I knew I had to begin riding home. They invited me to visit their church, and before leaving, I hugged each of them.
There was no judgment or concern about our differences, religions, backgrounds, politics, or beliefs. We were simply people sharing music, prayer, food, and an experience that needed no explanation.
Before leaving, we took a picture together. I sent it to Mike, one of the men in the group, and we said goodbye.
About a mile into my ride home, I received a text.
“Keith, it’s Mike. I just want you to know I’m in stage four cancer. Please pray for me.”
I started crying and pulled over to the side of the road.
An hour earlier, Mike had been a stranger. Now I was crying for a man who had welcomed me into his circle and trusted me with one of the most painful truths of his life.
Tears over a man I had just met, yet somehow connected with, who may have only a few months to live.
The most powerful people are the ones who demonstrate empathy in leadership.
I thought about everything I would have missed if I had kept riding: the invitation, the songs, the prayers, the laughter, the hugs, the human connection we all crave, and Mike.
Empathy in Leadership Begins With Understanding
We judge people too quickly. We allow differences in religion, politics, appearance, and beliefs to determine whether someone belongs in our lives before giving them the chance to show us who they are.
We do the same thing in leadership. We label people difficult, unmotivated, negative, or resistant before taking the time to understand who they are and what they’re going through.
You cannot lead with empathy or connect with someone you have already reduced to a label.
Sit with people you perceive as different from you. Listen to them. Ask questions. Care enough to suspend judgment and discover who they are beneath the assumptions, labels, and lies amplified by social media.
The truth about people is found through experience, not someone else’s opinion. That is where common ground begins.
A week later, I attended their church service. They welcomed me with the same warmth, love, and kindness I had felt on the beach.
As Jerry Garcia sang, “If you get confused, listen to the music play.”
⭐⭐⭐Hire Keith On-Demand as Your Coach. HOURLY COACHING NOW AVAILABLE! ⭐⭐⭐
Empathy in Leadership
