Trust is the backbone of coaching. Not only is it important to understand what steps to take to build trust, it’s crucial to understand which activities you might accidentally engage in that destroy trust as well.
In my last blog post, I shared a story about a management team that reinforced the fact that trust is the backbone of coaching.
Remember, trust and loyalty are earned, not inherited, so become mindful of those things that you need to stay away from that will erode the trust you need for your coaching to succeed and to foster a healthy, open coaching relationship from the start.
Here’s a short list of activities and behaviors that will erode the trust managers desperately need that will drive improved performance, loyalty, commitment and more sales.
What jumps out for you?
- Not being present
- Multitasking during conversation (You think you’re being efficient? That perceived efficiency comes at a major cost. Think of the message you’re sending to your people. “I guess I’m not that important.”
- Not following through on commitments
- Canceling (coaching) appointments
- Violating/breaking your word. Not keeping your promise
- Breaking confidence
- Double talk
- Threats and consequential negativity
- Disposition. Tone. Being curt. Egocentric not showing your people are a priority (but an interruption or a bother.)
- Being confrontational
- Not showing patience (in a conversation or when coaching them)
- Reacting negatively to something a person did wrong
- The style of your management (pitchfork passive, pontificator, presumptuous, perfect, problem solving, proactive – See Coaching Salespeople into Sales Champions for the 7 Types of Managers)
- Not owning your own mistakes or your humanity (Your ego gets in the way)
- Competition from manager
- Not making the conversation/coaching safe
- Not setting expectations in the coaching relationship
- Not drawing a clear line between performance management/reviews and coaching
Tip from the Coach: What your people see and feel based on your actions always takes precedent over your intentions and what you say.
Tips and Questions For Managers When Setting Confidentiality in the Coaching Relationship
- What does confidentiality look like?
- What can you honor?
- Code of ethics – What nullifies confidentiality? (lie, cheat, steal, violate protocol and procedures, etc.)
- Establish how big, wide and deep the safe zone is up front
- You can’t change the rules in the middle of the game
Photo Credit: Brian Smithson (Old Geordie)