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Coaching Up – How to Break Through The Reluctance to Coaching Your Boss. Part Two

To continue our conversation around how to effectively coach up and build upon part one of this multi-part series, unfortunately, many people believe that approaching their manager in a way that would make them receptive to what they have to say is a very difficult task at hand. Some even feel it’s an impossible one. What compounds this challenge is, there are still those managers who fall victim of a very prevalent coaching myth. That is, they think they are coaching their people but they are really not.

Many times, (well, most of the time) managers aren’t even aware of this or the things they are doing that compromises the relationship and trust they have with their direct reports (a blind spot for them.) Here’s an example that supports this. It’s an email that I received from a manager looking for some advice on dealing with this very issue.

Dear Mr. Rosen,
I am currently reading your book “Coaching Salespeople Into Sales Champions” cover to cover for the 2nd time in the past few months. I am a Regional Field Sales Manager for a National Company. A few months ago, our boss read your book and became very enthralled by it. Now, we have begun “Coaching” our Sales Reps. The biggest problem I am facing now is that my boss has decided that he will coach us, the management team, beginning with me. I am having issues that I need to overcome or work on my resume, which is not in my plan. Incidentally, all of the Nine Barriers to Effective Coaching that you list in your book are there, starting with:

1. He is a total “A Type” of Personality. Everything is his way and his ways are always correct.
2. There is a lack of trust. He has shown before that what you say can and will be held against you.
3. I am not comfortable sharing my personal life and goals with him because he is judgmental.
4. His coaching training is no different from mine. That is, we haven’t been formally trained on how to coach and have only been exposed to your book at this point.

Your suggestions and/or comments will be greatly appreciated.

Maybe this situation sounds all too familiar? Here’s where you have an opportunity to be proactive and do some coaching. First, you need to enroll your manager in being open to hearing some ideas in the first place regarding how you would like to be managed, along with some concerns you may have around being coached to ensure that the rules of the game are established up front.

Of course, there may be some situations, like the one this manager shared in their email that create even more reluctance around wanting to approach your boss in the first place. You may feel that your manager may not care enough to be open to this type of discussion. Maybe there’s an existing trust issue, especially if your manager has already compromised your trust or confidentiality. Or, maybe you believe, and you may even have the evidence to support the fact that your manager’s degree of self awareness or their ability to look in the mirror and do some personal assessment and diagnostic reflection is simply nonexistent.

No matter what the current situation is with your boss, where does that leave you today? At a place of choice. Keep in mind my definition of coaching: The art of creating possibility. Sure, you can continue to be an evidence collector to support your position but I don’t think that’s going to change your current relationship with your boss. Conversely, you can take a stand for yourself and for your boss and do something different that in turn, would create a new possibility.

So, what exactly would it sound like when coaching up around this very situation? In the upcoming posts, I’ll be providing several examples of what you can say to your boss in order to foster an open dialogue that would create the possibility of reinventing your relationship with your boss, as well as establishing clear expectations and boundaries around your coaching.

Of course, I would suggest slightly modifying this so that the manner in which you communicate this message fits best for you, without changing the essence of the message. I realize that some people may believe this to be a difficult conversation to have. However, keep this in mind. It’s only difficult because we don’t have the words or an approach we have faith in that would create a better possibility. Or, we make the assumption that this would never, ever work on my manager. As a result, we shy away from what we perceive to be a difficult conversation or one that would create friction and confrontation and never attempt to create a better opportunity for ourselves.

The result? You continue to tolerate a toxic situation or find yourself looking for a new career opportunity elsewhere. All because you weren’t willing to take a stand for yourself, what you know is best and right for you and instead, you cross your fingers and hope it’s better elsewhere or you hope that, miraculously, the situation will resolve itself on its own over time.

Shifting from Confrontation to Conversation

Think about what confrontation truly is. Confrontation is what happens when you have both eyes focused solely on your own agenda rather than first embracing, respecting and understanding the other person’s point of view to create a new possibility that you didn’t see before.

This is why it is so critical to reinforce the importance of the language and message you use to approach and position a seemingly difficult situation that will result in creating a new and better outcome. It truly is the message that matters.

Check back over the next day or so for Part Three in this multi-part series as we continue to uncover effective ways to coach up. Next, you’ll discover The Eight Critical Guidelines To Be Mindful Of When Coaching Up.

The Salesperson of The Future. Will They Truly Evolve and Be Different or Is it Just About Living It?

During a recent interview, I was asked, “What does the future hold for the work force, especially for salespeople? How will the salesperson of tomorrow change or be different to adapt to the times?”

Of course, my visceral reaction was to come up with something so transformational and insightful that it would reshape the landscape of professional selling and salesmanship. But after I paused and thought more about this question at a deeper level, I realized this may not be truly possible. After all, when it comes to selling, outside of the apparent changes in technology that continues to shape the Sales 2.0 evolution, what has changed over the years? Is there really a new definition for professional selling?

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Are Salespeople Asking Prospects the Wrong Questions?

“Are salespeople asking their prospects the wrong questions?” As I mentioned in my last post, this was a conversation that came up while being interviewed by Geoffrey James for an article he was writing for Selling Power magazine on what managers need to do to effectively coach their sales team when cold calling.

The answer to this question? Well, it’s actually yes and no. Yes, many salespeople are asking good questions that help uncover whether or not the prospect is a fit for the product or service they are selling. Conversely, many are asking the wrong questions that drive the prospect away from you, rather than move them closer to a sale.

The real universal gap that I see after coaching and training thousands of salespeople,

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Before You Qualify Prospects Using Better Questions, First Make the Questions Fit For You

While being interviewed by Geoffrey James for an article he was writing for Selling Power magazine on what managers need to do to effectively coach their sales team when cold calling, a question regarding how effectively salespeople are qualifying their prospects surfaced during our conversation. (Geoffrey is also the author of seven books and the columnist for BNET, Business 2.0, CIO, The New York Times as well as many other publications.)

You can find Geoffrey’s blog here, which lists some of the deeper qualifying questions that salespeople must learn to ask.

To go beyond these questions for a moment, what I actually found to be intriguing were the comments that readers had posted after reading his blog. Now, I’m all for and certainly encourage feedback and comments, all in the spirit of mutual collaboration, growth and stimulating a valuable dialogue. And I applaud anyone who’s willing to take the time and post their thoughts and comments, good or bad, as I am always open to a healthy debate with those who may not always agree with my point of view or share a different perspective on the subject matter at hand.

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My Blog Voted Top 100 Blogs to Boost Your Sales Skills

Just got this email and thought I’d share it with you. Looks like a good resource.

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Hi Keith!
We just posted an article, “Top 100 Blogs to Boost Your Sales Skills.” I thought I’d bring it to your attention in case you think your readers would find it interesting.

I am happy to let you know that your site has been included in this list.

Thanks for your time!

When and How to Ask for Referrals

To complement my last blog where I shared some valuable tips on how to generate more referrals that were provided by my colleague Dr. Tony Alessandra, I felt we needed to get even more tactical by revisiting the positioning, language and the dialogue you need to be mindful of when actually asking for a referral, as well as the proper time and place to do so. Below is a strategy that has helped many salespeople and non selling professionals build their pipeline and their practice by knowing when and how to ask for referrals. What follows is a dialogue you can use that honors the permission based selling model that I’ve written about in my cold calling book.

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What exactly classifies as a referral? If we were to create some parameters that define what a referral is, this is what it would look like.

Synonymous with “recommendation” and “testimonial,” a referral is a potential prospect that is directed or given to you by someone you know or someone you don’t know who feels that you are the best source for help or information regarding a specific, subject, product, or service.

What makes a referral so incredibly attractive and desirable is that it is, for the most part, a warm lead. That is, when you approach a referral, there is less of a need to convince or sell them. A certain degree of interest, credibility, and comfort has already been established. Chances are, there’s already a need present. All you have to do then, is turn that need into a want or a desire for your product using the questions in your needs analysis.

Typically, your clients are going to be the top source for referral business simply because they are the ones who actually utilize your product, making them the most effective testimonial you can find to endorse your product.

The following dialogue illustrates how you can establish a referral agreement with your clients. This way, you will be able to identify the clients who are willing to become a referral source for you and the most appropriate time to ask them for referrals. This is a great example of how to set up your strategy to increase the amount of referral business you currently generate.

You: “Mrs. Client, may I take a moment to share with you how I build my business?”

Client: “Sure.”

You: “Well, what I enjoy most about what I do and where my time is best served is working with my clients. I want to spend as much time as possible serving my clients and exceeding your expectations. In order for me to spend more time with my clients and less time marketing or prospecting for new business I really need the help of my satisfied clients.

Please understand, I’m certainly not asking for any referrals from you now. Personally, I feel that would be incredibly presumptuous to ask you to introduce me to other potential clients before you even have a chance to truly utilize and benefit from my services. After all, we just started working together!

However, in a couple of months or even weeks, when you are clearly realizing the benefits of my services and have gotten even more value than you expected, would you be comfortable sharing the results you have experienced with others and introduce me to those people who might also benefit from my services?”

Client: “Sure, I don’t see why not.

You: “That sounds great. Thanks in advance for this consideration. Just so I know what it will take to make you a raving fan, what can I do to make you comfortable enough to actually want to refer business to me?”

The most effective way to earn referrals is to over- deliver on the value your clients expect so that you actually exceed their expectations. Once you confirm this to be true, it now becomes a great time to ask for testimonials or a reference from a happy client.

If you find that you are having difficulty asking for referrals, then question how strong your belief is in your product, your commitment to serving your clients, and the value proposition you can deliver.

Setting up a referral agreement with your clients will remove any reluctance and make you feel much more comfortable when asking them for referrals. Since they now know this is something you will be asking of them, it’s okay to ask.

Tony Alessandra Week on CanDoGo – Generate More Referrals

Last week on CanDoGo.com was Tony Alessandra week. While a little late on the draw this week, the good news is, you can still access all of Tony’s videos and tips on CanDoGo. This one in particular I felt was so relevant during a time where customer retention and acquisition is top of mind for all companies and salespeople. Below are some best practices when it comes to asking for referrals.
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Asking for Referrals
By Dr. Tony Alessandra

Watch the Video

Ask for referrals anytime a customer offers positive feedback about you, your company, or your product. Often, the best time to do so is right after your customer has a problem resolved by you, and you’ve proven that you can and will follow through. Any time you ask for referrals, follow these guidelines:

1. Ask for specific referrals to narrow the customer’s focus. Word your questions so that the customer thinks about a specific environment and a specific situation. For example: “Do you know of any colleagues in your business club whose needs are similar to yours?”
2. Gather as much information about the new customer as possible. In an informal, casual manner, ask about the referrals, business, needs and behavioral style. For example, ask “What did he say to you that indicated he has such a need?”
3. Ask your customer for permission to use his or her name. This should be no problem if you have built a solid relationship with that customer.
4. Ask your customer for help in obtaining an appointment with the referral.
5. Contact the referral as soon as possible, and then inform your customer about the outcome of the contact. If the customer decides to buy, send your referring customer a thank-you gift. If the customer doesn’t buy, send your referring customer a thank-you note for trying.

PODCAST: Benchmark Best Sales Practices to Achieve Your Sales Goals

Listen to the full podcast here.

Companies are running so fast in an attempt to catch up on their sales numbers that they aren’t aware of the blinders they’ve developed which are obstructing their view of the fuller picture when it comes to selling and driving the right sales activity, especially the deeper level of questioning and discovery every salesperson needs to engage in today.

Sure, you can ask your prospects the more generic questions about the current products, services, solutions and venders they currently use. But what about the questions that facilitate a buying decision; the tougher questions that help you better understand if this prospect is, in fact, even qualified to buy from you now, in the near future or ever? Delivering a recent seminar to a senior team of sales professionals reinforced how most salespeople, regardless of how experienced or seasoned, are still stepping over the additional questions I’m suggesting we need to ask.

I’m referring to questions that uncover:

  • A deeper understanding of how they buy,
  • How they make decisions,
  • The internal workings of the company,
  • The people and egos involved,
  • The process they are going to go through when they hang up the phone with you or end the meeting and then attempt to solve the problem or find a new solution on their own using the resources or venders they currently have,
  • The concerns or roadblocks that you could encounter down the road that would stall or destroy the potential for a sale,
  • The timely and relevant issues that are going on internally,
  • The overall mood of the company and its leaders, and so on.
  • Here’s a tip from your coach: Low closing percentages = a misalignment in who you should be presenting to and following up with in the first place.

    If you don’t have the answers to these questions, you’re robbing yourself of the opportunity to enjoy the certainty and peace of mind that comes from utilizing a formulaic approach to selling. After all, if you define it, you can then refine it.

    So, if you’re ever wondering why you or other salespeople fall into what’s known as a ‘sales slump,’ here’s the main cause of that. They aren’t honoring their sales process by the numbers and as such, those who continue to ‘wing it’ as their overall selling strategy are destined to experience the ups and downs in performance and in their stress level, as well as the waning sense of satisfaction and confidence that’s sure to follow in its wake when this amount of ambiguity and uncertainly is present.

    In this podcast, I detail several critical questions you need to answer that will enable you to uncover the gaps in your data pool that in turn, will help refine your overall approach to how you prospect and sell and the measurable effort that’s required for you to do so successfully.

    Listen to the full podcast here.

    Stop Focusing on Your Goals and Start Honoring Your Process


    The result is the process.
    A timely paradox and critical mind shift that every salesperson and manager must make if they want to transcend the mediocre performance they may be experiencing today.

    Even before you can engage in the type of sales benchmarking activities that I wrote about the other day, (you can find that blog post here) or even take the time to refine your selling skills, you will come head to head with resistance to selling by the numbers if this change in attitude around how we approach selling is not fully embraced beforehand.

    I was reminded how important this was during a seminar I delivered last week in NYC. At the end of the seminar, one manager raised his hand and posed this question to me. He said, “Our sales cycle has changed dramatically. Our salespeople can no longer make a call and take an order. Our product offering has been modified and as a result, the average cost of our product has increased, which has all contributed to a longer sales cycle. However, my salespeople are still reluctant to change. They’re still stuck in that transactional way of selling. They’re getting more frustrated and discouraged because sales aren’t happening fast enough, all because they’re unsure how to manage this longer selling cycle. I’ve told them many times over, that our sales cycle is no longer the way it used to be, and we need to be more patient with the process and more consultative with our customers. I’ve explained to them over and over again, that we need to modify and re-engineer our selling process in response to these new challenges, the changes we’re up against and how our customers make a purchasing decision and buy from us. What else can I do?”

    As this sales manager was explaining his challenge, I was thinking to myself how important it is today, more than ever, to become process driven. Without this change in our thinking, salespeople will be unable to honor the process needed to convert more conversations into sales, let alone build out a more robust process and selling strategy that will enable them to do so. As such, the eternal conflict between our tactical strategy and our thinking will continue to rage on.
    I have a detailed article on this very subject that you can find here. The original title of this article was WARNING! Goals May Be Hazardous To Your Success. Are They Sabotaging Your Selling Efforts?

    As my colleague Dr. Tony Alessandra explains in the following statistics, “It’s amazing how many times success can be assured by attending to the basics of the job.” For example, in a study of 257 Fortune 500 companies, the following was found:

    17% do not determine an approximate duration for each sales call.
    23% do not use a computer to assist in time and territory management.
    28% do not set profit objectives for their accounts.
    37% do not use prescribed routing patterns in covering territories.
    46% do not look at their use of time in any organized way.
    49% do not determine the economical number of calls for each account.
    49% do not use prepared sales presentations.
    70% do not use call schedules.
    75% do not have a system for classifying customers according to sales potential.
    76% do not set sales objectives for their accounts.
    81% do not use a call report system.

    So, the question is: How can you assure your future success by eliminating these oversights?”

    The fact is, companies will fail to invest the time in order to eliminate these process oriented oversights and embed these necessary changes into their process if the sales culture is too focused on getting to the result by forging ahead in an attempt to close more sales. Managers can continually push their people to become more mindful of these numbers, however, it’s the process driven questions managers need to be more sensitive to rather than the result driven questions that managers obsess over that continue to perpetuate this toxic way of thinking. Those questions sound like, “Are you hitting your numbers? How many follow-up calls did you make today? How much good volume did you book this month? How many leads did you run this week?” While important, these questions only focus on half of the equation. What is missing is the “How,” that is, the questions that focus on the process the salesperson needs to engage in to achieve the desired end result.

    Managers need to stop coaching to the result and start coaching to the process, instead.

    Become more mindful of the process that will drive the results you seek. Without the change in your result driven attitude that’s keeping you stuck in the first place, all efforts to better manage your selling strategy by a numeric formula are certain to be short lived.

    For salespeople and sales leaders, the fundamental shift in our attitude that needs to occur is this; move away from being so result driven and instead, become more process driven.

    We must honor this paradox and break free of the limiting thinking that confines us to the current level of performance we’re experiencing. If we truly want to excel today, realize the result is truly the process.

    Here’s more on this paradox.

    Are You Selling By the Numbers or Selling With a Blindfold On? Statistical Benchmarks for Success and Self Accountability That Most Organizations Are Still Missing

    Stop. Just stop for the next several minutes that it’s going to take you to read this. Okay, now take a breath. Get off the treadmill for a moment and ask yourself these questions. Yes, these questions are that important. So important, in fact, that they could change your entire perspective around what you’re doing, how you’re doing it and how much you really need to be doing in order to generate the worthwhile results you’re looking for.

    Because the truth is, you just may be running so fast in an attempt to catch up on your sales numbers, that you didn’t recognize the blinders you’ve developed which are obstructing your view of the fuller picture; the landscape you’re trying to farm and manage when it comes to selling and driving the right sales activity. Here are those questions you need to ask yourself (and your sales team).

    “With all the effort I’m putting forth in an attempt to generate more prospects and selling opportunities, following up and retaining existing clients to ensure that I’m bringing in as much business as possible:”

    • Am I acutely aware of the activities and benchmarked proven practices (both the activities and the dialogue/message I need to communicate) that I need to engage in daily that would secure my success?
    • Am I measuring the numbers and the results of my efforts and allowing these statistical data points to be the driving force behind my sales activities?
    • Do I know how much cold calling and prospecting activity is actually enough (emails, voice mails, live calls/connections, letters, and so on) and when to call it quits and move on when attempting to convert a contact into a qualified prospect?
    • Do I know how many calls/contacts I need to make each day, each week and how often I need to follow up with a qualified prospect in order to earn their business or move them to the next stage of my sales process? (And have I even defined those specific steps in my sales process to begin with?)
    • Am I holding myself accountable when it comes to engaging in the right activities in the most efficient way possible through the effective use of a daily routine?
    • When calling on or meeting with prospects, do I have a clear set of outlined objectives that I need to accomplish on every call and during each meeting, especially when delivering a presentation?
    • Have I identified the lifetime value of each client or account in order to classify customers according to their sales potential? (What’s the economic impact of the time you invest?)
    • Do I have a detailed strategy for each of my clients to ensure that I’m maximizing every conceivable up selling and cross selling opportunity?
    • Am I fully leveraging the power and potential of my CRM solution for prospect, client as well as territory management? Do you have a call report system?
    • Do I have the right questions that provide me with the critical intel I need in order to qualify each person as a viable prospect so that I can most effectively determine where my limited and precious time is best invested?

    And to clarify further when it comes to the type of questions you need to be asking each prospect, this isn’t limited to Selling 101 – Uncovering a Need. I’m also referring to understanding how they buy, how they make decisions, the internal workings of the company, the people and egos involved, the process they are going to go through when they hang up the phone with you or end the meeting and then attempt to solve the problem or find a new solution on their own using the resources or venders they currently have, the concerns or roadblocks that you could encounter down the road that would stall or destroy the potential for a sale, the timely and relevant issues that are going on internally, the overall mood of the company and its leaders, and so on. (Hint: Low closing percentages = misalignment in who you should be presenting to and following up with in the first place.)

    If you don’t have the answers to these crucial questions, you’re robbing yourself of the opportunity to enjoy the certainty and peace of mind that comes from utilizing a formulaic approach to selling. After all, if you define it, you can then refine it. So, if you’re ever wondering why you or other salespeople fall into what’s known as a ‘sales slump,’ here’s the main cause of that. They aren’t honoring their sales process by the numbers and as such, those who continue to ‘wing it’ as their overall selling strategy are destined to experience the ups and downs in performance and in their stress level, as well as the waning sense of satisfaction and confidence that’s sure to follow in its wake when this amount of ambiguity and uncertainly is present.

    I’ve decided (and many of my clients and readers are on board with this as well, so I hope you’ll join us) that it’s no longer as tough as it was out there. That’s right. Strip away what you hear in the media, and look objectively at what you can control; this one telltale sign that something in your selling formula needs to be developed, modified or redefined:

    If there are people in your organization, even in your industry or profession who are currently performing like rock stars, that should provide you with one very critical insight. That is, it can be done because it is currently being done by someone else!

    Of course it is going to remain “tough out there” if you don’t have your defined best practices, data points and numeric formula to help support your selling efforts. After all, it’s one thing to up your game and work on developing and refining your selling skills as well as your sales management skills. However, to complement this so that you have a comprehensive solution to better performance, you need to have your finger on the pulse of the numbers that will drive your activities in the first place as you exercise your newfound selling and leadership strategies and newly developed competencies. Use these questions I’ve posed to help uncover the gaps in your data pool that in turn, will help refine your overall approach to how you prospect and sell and the measurable effort that’s required for you to do so successfully.

    Here’s a very clear insight into one example of some general statistical information about the selling profession that will help you begin the process of fine tuning and developing your own data driven solution to increasing your sales.

    48% of salespeople never follow up with a prospect.
    25% of salespeople make a second contact and stop.
    12% of salespeople only make three contacts and stop.
    Only 10% of salespeople make more than three contacts.

    Now, get this:
    2% of sales are made on the first contact.
    3% of sales are made on the second contact.
    5% of sales are made on the third contact.
    10% of sales are made on the fourth contact.
    But 80% of sales are made on the fifth to twelfth contact.

    Now, these numbers may change depending upon your selling cycle, geographic location, the dollar amount of your deliverable, target audience as well as the service or product you’re selling but the essence of this message still remains in tact. That is, do you have your own set of data available which you have used as the cornerstone to constructing your prospecting and selling strategy? If not, it’s the same as getting into your car and saying to yourself before embarking on a trip, “Okay, I need to get to a specific destination, but I’m not exactly sure which direction to travel nor how long it’s going to take me to get there.”

    It’s no longer about simply ‘doing more’ but about doing more of what’s right. In our new marketplace, going out in the field and just doing more of what you did yesterday would be the same as trying to sell VCR’s, pagers and CD’s today. (Even my youngest asked me the other day, “Dad, what’s a CD?”). Your product has changed over the years and while your selling and management strategy needs to evolve as well, this evolution must be guided by the numeric benchmarks in order to see the full, panoramic picture of the truth that surrounds your current situation. This will eliminate the costly oversights I’ve detailed earlier and ensure your future success.

    We all need to be reminded of this universal law, “We resist what we need to learn the most.” And interestingly, while salespeople and sales managers are more inclined to take the reactionary, visceral attitude, “Lets just get out there and make it happen,” we need to pull back the reigns before engaging in blind sales activities and instead, start with doing what is often perceived as the more mundane, often boring task of benchmarking the right practices and then measuring their effectiveness by the numbers before embarking on these activities. Empirical data will provide the blueprint you need to succeed as well as the certainty, confidence and conviction necessary for a healthy sales mind and attitude.

    After all, the greatest rainmakers realize the importance of checking the weather first so they know where the best locations are to make it rain, and have the tools to do so.

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    Note: If you’re looking for a great tool to help develop your prospecting formula and the measurable efforts needed to achieve your sales goals, check out my Prospecting Calculator here and enjoy the confidence and certainty you’ll experience when you prospect by the numbers.

    Here’s the link to the Prospecting Calculator.